"no"

So my sweet baby has learned how to use a new word. David and Sarah had come over to pick up some wedding cards that were sent here, and Squirt was just waking up from a nap. When I brought her down, she was still a little cranky and clingy, but overall happy because she saw that David and Sarah were here. Uncle David asked her "Do you want to come see me?" and she shook her head and said in a very sweet little voice "no". It was so cute. They kept asking her if she wanted to come see them just to see/hear her say no in such a cute little way.

She's been struggling for the past couple weeks with an abscess on her neck. It started right as we got to Colorado for our visit and then just got worse, until we finally took her to the dr when we got home a week later. at that point they told us what it was (we were thinking swollen lymph nodes) and gave her some antibiotics which were supposed to either make it go away, or make it come to a head. For those of you who don't know what an abscess is, it's like a boil, but bigger. Similar to the problem I had while I was pregnant.

Well by friday last week, it had come to a head so we took her in and then drained it, which was super disgusting and sad and traumatizing at the same time. They had her strapped down to this board and had a nurse holding her head down while the dr worked and then packed the empty cavity with this really skinny tape like gauze.

The worst part for me is that every day I change her dressing and then have to pull out 2 inches of the gauze and cut it off. Yuk. Pulling stuff out of my baby's neck like it was a floss dispenser is really disturbing, and I swear Frik almost pukes every time he thinks about it.

The whole ordeal has made me fall even more in love with our pediatricians office, though. They drove me home on the day of the draining because frik had to get to class. They've been calling and having us come in after hours no charge to get the dressing changed or to take a look at her to make sure it's ok... and the dr called a couple times over the weekend just to check and see how we're doing and left us with his cell phone number. It was really nice to have someone care about us so much!

I've also realized that Squirt doesn't like older men. We saw a younger dr when we went in the first time (around 30 or so) and then our regular dr came in (in his late 50s I'd guess) and although squirt was fine with the first dr, she was scared and cried for the second one. So Wizard, don't take it personally! You're just too old ;)When I thought about it a bit, I realized that it's probably because Squirt never really associates with any older men since my dad isn't here all the time and Frik's dad is gone, so she has no problems with grandmas and mommy and daddy age people, but grandpas are a foreign concept to her. We've gotta find a surrogate grandpa around here...

BIG doggy

We went for a walk the other day around the block, and the people who live behind us have horses, so I asked if we could go back and see them. As soon as squirt saw them she started saying "Doodun" which doesn't sound like duke or dog really, but it's the word that she says whenever she sees duke, so i think it's just her way of saying it. The horse startled her when he brought his head towards her, but after a few minutes and after seeing me pet the horse, she reached out to pet him. It was a very nice horse and when we started leaving, it trotted along the side of his pen to follow us. It was very cute.

she has another tooth now, so that makes 7. :D I had my first day of nursery yesterday at church (in this ward anyway) and I have to admit that I wasn't looking forward to being in the nursery when they called me, but as soon as one of the little girls reached up to hold my hand, I changed my mind.  I really have it easy. I'm not even in the nursery with the kids having to play with them and keep them entertained, I just take them to go get their parents when they have to go potty or change a diaper, and help shuffle them from room to room. I'm in charge of the older half of the nursery along with one other girl who is my neighbor, and there are 3 groups in that older half that get moved around between 2 rooms the whole time. It's pretty crazy. Then the younger half has another 3 groups and will need a 4th one by the end of the year. TONS of kids. I love this ward!

Speak softly...

Squirt went outside to play today and found a big stick on the ground probably about 4 feet long and decided she had to have it:



She carried it around with her for the next 5 minutes or so until I made her come inside. It sucks because it's not quite warm enough for her to play outside for very long, but she really loves going "bye bye" and will stand banging on the door crying "bye bye! bye bye!" if she doesn't get to go out.

I have been amazed lately by how much she has learned. I told her the other day "let's change your diaper" and she walked over and grabbed a diaper and handed it to me. If I say "let's go upstairs" she heads over to the stairs. I can ask her to get me her shoes and she brings them to me. It's crazy for me to think of how much I say that she really understands now, and it's funny when she hears me say a word she knows how to say so she'll repeat it back to me. Today while I was changing her diaper, I said, "you have a cute butt" (something I thought was so weird until I was a mom... thinking a butt is cute? seriously?) And she looked back at me and said "butt butt butt". She can also say poop (hahaha) and cheese and duke and daddy and bye bye of course, and the cutest thing is that she'll say "david" when she's looking at him and guildy's engagement picture... of course, she also says david now when she looks at her growth chart and points to the picture of mickey mouse...

She is just growing so much and it's really amazing to me to be able to see it!

Oh and for those of you who may be wondering about the 90% of humanity being scum bags, I think you can blame the most recent episode of House for Frik's overreaction... I'm sorry, honey! I love you! <3

Revision

So I guess I have to post again after last night's post. I didn't expect that anyone would actually read it until maybe another week or so had passed and somebody accidentally hit my blog. Sadly, I didn't account for those pesky RSS feeds.

Last night's blog post was the product of taking in months worth of noxious back-biting in single evening, letting it fester for a couple hours, and finally needing a place to unload it. I must have drafted at least 10 emails and another 5 blog posts before I was finally able to write something coherent. In short, something had to give, and it did.

In hindsight, I've been reminded once again of why I try to avoid this kind of toxic discourse we so affectionately call social drama, as nothing truly good ever came of it.

Finally, I have to revise my numbers a bit. 100% of the human population has a festering cesspool of disgust and hate buried somewhere deep inside their persona. You just don't get to see it very often because it stays hidden behind a generally decent exterior. I apologize to those people I offended.

I’m so full of hurt and anger right now…

and yet have very little to say.

I used to truly believe that, deep down (further down for some than others) 90% of the human population were good people. I'm now convinced it's more like 10% of people are good inside, and 90% are a festering cespool of disgust and hate. (Some hide it better than others, so my numbers could still be off a bit)

So, what would happen if we all dispensed with the niceties, the falsehoods, the decency, and the platitudes? I can't begin to imagine, but I got a taste of it today and I am still at a loss to describe how it made me feel.

Carolyn Needs...

Here's what you do: Google your name with the word 'needs' after it. Put it all in quotes like this: "Harvey needs" or "Darren needs" Make a list of the first 10 things that make sense that Google spits out.

1. Carolyn needs a spanking =)

2. Carolyn needs good food, good shelter

3. Carolyn needs to take long hot baths and add some herbs.

4. Carolyn needs to cut back on stress and find emotional satisfaction.

5. Carolyn needs us guys.

6. CAROLYN NEEDS TO KNOW.

7. Carolyn needs urgent sponsorship.

8. Carolyn needs someone to cut her food and stay close by in case she chokes.

9. Carolyn needs to turn 15 more or gain 365 more Zombe points to reach the next level.

10. Carolyn needs phone #'s because her mom accidentally washed her phone.

Scavenger Hunt

Lately, I've been finding items in interesting places: tomato sauce on the book shelf, magenets in the lazy susan cabinet, princess dolls in my spaghetti pan to name a few. It seems that Squirt is going through a phase where she's liking to put things "away" just not in the right places. It's funny, I've seen her move a bag of rice from one cabinet to another, as if she just thought that it was better suited to the other cabinet.

She has this set of princess dolls though that she got for Christmas. She LOVES them and carries them around with her everywhere, so when it comes time to put them away, it's like playing hide and seek.

Most of you know that we are planning a trip to disney world. The original plan was for late 2009, then it got pushed to early 2010, and now it's back to late 2009 just because that way we won't have to buy Squirt a plane ticket. I get excited every time I think about it and start planning it at all... needless to say I'm really looking forward to it :)

For those of you who don't know, Frik has a habit of seeing products that are on sale for really cheap and then buying them to resell them. It's something that is kind of crazy, but also an easy profit (if he ever gets around to listing them on ebay or craigslist). Currently for sale, we have 3 pink graphing calculators (ti-84 plus) so if any of you are interested, let me know!